planning.

 I had set a 7-am alarm.

But it's 2:30 am, and I'm still awake. 

Not restless, nor anxious. 

I'm just not able to close my eyes at all. 

Like there's a surge of energy that's been keeping me up. 

I just got one of the best news I had this year:

I'm visiting my 2nd home, soon. 

--- 

I first lived in Melbourne 7 years ago - crazy!

That city really shaped me as a young adult. 

And soon, I'll have a chance to visit the city, 

but this time, as a slightly-older young adult.

This brain began listing down all the things I want to relive: 

Which memory lanes to explore?

What new experiences I want to try, now that I'm no longer a student?  

All the things I should've tried when I still lived there but didn't get the chance to,

All the new and hip places, ...

All the things I'd been missing and longing for. 

I love planning;

I'm in my best mood when I'm planning, and this 'To-do' list definitely grows to exceed the time that we'll actually have. 

On the other hand, though, I'm creating another list, 

of back up plans and things that might go wrong. 

I'm planning for disappointments. 

Like, what if it's too hot to walk around as much as I liked? 

Or what if it rains horribly? 

What if my friends are back home when I'm there,

or what if all my favorite spots are closed down? 

I'm not trying to be pessimistic;

What I'm trying to do is looking at reality and learning to go with its rhythm:

sometimes things are perfect and sometimes things aren't. C'est la vie. 

Most times, there's nothing we can do about it. 

But for me, I want to be prepared. 

If I rock up and things go down horribly, I'm gonna sulk. 

But, if I have time to prepare my heart & mind, I'll gladly accept even the worst scenarios. 

It won't be fun, but at least my dreams won't be crushed right then and there, 

and I know to take whatever win is available. 

My kind of contingency plans. 

---

It's closer to 3 am. 

I'm finally settled. 

My heart is ready for the adventure - the beginning, middle, and end. 

Whatever flows in the middle, I'm ready to enjoy it. 

The countdown begins. 

I'm so excited.